HOW BEAUTIFUL DEATH IS?

Dying doesn't cause any pain instead it frees you from the piercing chains of this wicked world. When someone start dying they loose control of their body, suddenly air doesn't fill their lungs enough their throat becomes parched they feel all kinds of pain for few seconds and in those few seconds whole of their lifespan flash in front of their eyes, they start finding reasons that why is this happening to them why is it all ending so soon.. their mind begs for more time so that they can at least say their sorry and thank you but death is cruel it makes you curse your self for not spending your time in a non regrettable way.. in our last few minutes also we think of nothing but our own selfish desires... but time is passing by and after all that large amount of suffering in just few seconds of dying, there is peace, a peace where our sorrow ends all this pain goes away.. we move to a place where no body knows us.. we are alone with no memories and regrets.. in those few seconds of peace, life ends.. and one beast dies from this earth... we humans are just fleeting beings, we are born, we try to play our role but eventually no body does it... gets tiered of trying... we refuse whats doesn't benefits us we accept what we seem to love... but all this ends with us being returned to dust at last...Precious to me now is my own soul as it is what now only thing of my own as for my body it will turn on me when the time come for it to rot and return to nothing.

YOU STILL MAKE ME BLUSH

Judge me all  you want, but i still savor the look on your face whenever I see you. Nothing else tore me down as much as just one look at your face did. Air seems to be thicker now and my eyes seems to be all red, the sharp tinge of pain that I suffered in those mere few seconds seems to remind me that I am still not over you. The moment where my heart stopped for a second thought and I felt all the blood rushing to my brain, when my lungs remain contracted just cause there was a moment of pause in my life that remained. I felt what your mere presence can do to me, what I thought was gone was still there. Your face made me remember the love once I had for you. In that blink of moment I felt life leaving me, cause I am unable to call you anymore, my throat went soar, my eyes became wet just by seeing you again, I cried without any sound.
Many days had past since we use to be on, but still your smiling face makes me happy. Though cursing is the only way we communicate now but even now your presence made me satisfied, my day felt complete. I was shocked at the content that I felt because of you. My mind hates the thought of talking to you again but still I was at bliss. All this made me realize that somethings stay with you forever even if you wish it to be gone.
Your image is burned in my brain like a birthmark on child.

LET IT ALL GO

Just to become part of you I sacrificed my mere existence but you were that vast ocean in which a mere drop of tear couldn't find it self  within you. 

Sometimes we hold onto the feelings precious to us for so long that they loose their worth. Just to be happy we crave for things to remain same way, we wish to be part of it for even for a second more if we can. Some things make us vulnerable , they make us empty leaving us with only unfinished business. Feelings like being in love for too long even when the other side has left your hand, can be devastating. They can make us more and more hollow than any other feeling can, desiring something that we already lost can be painful. Some can make you tear even if you try put up a smile, its like going through a hell of a torment in a  repeating cycle. Things like love are tough to deal with, even if you have a happy ending you will still feel emotions like jealousy, obsessiveness and fear of losing him will haunt you for eternity. And if you don't have a happy ending you will come to fear this emotion, your mind will never agree with your heart, you will never be able to fall in love again and even if you do it will always be with half ass feeling cause you already know how it can end and how much painful it was when you give it your all. When someone gives her 100% than meet with a bad fate people tend to stop believing in happy endings. They will always make them cry and will always make them remember their own  end. 

I wished for us to be like a rainbow on a sunny day but you became the storm that i never anticipated . I wanted to bind like river and ocean but you became the clouds high up in sky, only horizon was the illusion of our story. 

BEING BROKEN CAN MAKE YOU STRONGER

Mind breaks my heart every time I think of you because it knows that these thoughts are suicidal.

It is the rare talent of a human being to fall in love even after knowing the end of it. We humans love unconditionally, we fall so deep in love that their mere existence bless us with immense happiness. Being part of someone's soul is the beauty of being in love. Their presence makes you nervous, their voice attracts you, no matter how they sound their voice will always be the most beautiful music you ever heard. It is a strong feeling that will mesmerize you with all its might, even if you are drowning in it you will feel enchanted. When you fall in love with the wrong person you change in many ways but at the end of it you eventually grow, you get to know yourself better. You start becoming independent and you are okay with being alone. You become a supporting pillar for yourself to soar high above the ground. Love can give you painful past but its on you how you want your future to be. Standing up for yourself claiming the lost part of you is what keeps you moving on, it can be difficult but its far better than being part of something where your own self is deceiving you. Be bold, be loud and be furious to say about what you want and what is hurting to you because once you bow down the never ending self esteem demolishing will continue. Painful things happen with everyone and it is on our hand what we make out of it whether we choose to drown in our sorrow or become stronger than yesterday. Yearn for better tomorrow because past can never make you happier than it already did, dwelling in it won't change your present.

ENCHANTING FIRSTS

Even if I have to fall like an autumn leaf, I want to fall in love like the rain fall in every season just to touch the ground. As raindrops fall and touch the ground it makes no sound and it is yet so mesmerizing .Sometime things in our life are amazing even if we can't touch them, we can still feel the warmth and happiness they fill us with, like rain, snow or a gentle breeze in summer.
Everything amazing comes in our life at a moment when we least expect it to. Our first crush,first love or first kiss, they hit us like the beautiful weather after an unexpected shower in spring in which flowers are covered with cool water droplets and soil still light wet and the fragrance still refreshing. Sun shining through those drops and making every one of them appear like a pearl.Our whole life itself presents us with many gifts.Accidental encounter in a strange place with an unkown person whose one honest and kind smile makes your heart go all crazy and you experience your first crush. This is an amazing feeling, you get all nervous, blood rushes to your cheeks and make you go red ear to ear, you suddenly feel hot even if you are in a well ventilated place, your hand becomes all sweaty you get all worked up just because of that one person, getting embarrassed because all of this is so sudden and new to you and also for a complete stranger. These kind of things that happens so unexpectedly to us in our whole life, this is what make us feel alive and we may not notice but these feelings do matter. Its refreshing even if it lasts for few seconds these feelings make you feel heavenly and unleash so many desires in you that you never knew existed. Even for a second but a loving smile can make someone's heart go thump and stomach flutter. 
 I want to remember you like the feeling of first spring shower embedded so deep within me so that your memories  will forever be mine and that moment forever  be ours.

YOU ARE ENOUGH

I am part of a vast universe and there is a universe within me. We are unique in our own way, we all have unique personality. We live in our own small world and we enjoy what we create. We are both right and wrong. There is both light and darkness within us. We are creator and destroyer. We are a whole entity within ourselves. People believe in mutual feelings because they bring us happiness, we always desire others acknowledgement to feel great but there is nothing wrong in appreciating yourself even if no one else does because all we need is our own mind to be satisfied with what we do.  Being social has its own pros and cons, we should always remember that we are also part of that society hence our own thoughts does matter.  Now a days people depend on others to show them that they are doing well, even though all we need is our appreciation to make us happy. Nobody else matters as much as you to yourself, self doubt can cause mental stress and over dependence can make you weak and vulnerable. Being alone is not a negative point its a positive because it shows that you are strong enough to carry on and you can keep yourself happy enough. We should first fall in love with ourselves than with others ,if we won't appreciate what we are nobody else will.
I am what I create, I am what I wish to be. I am unique and am a whole new being in my own way.

LOVE, A WONDERFUL NOTION

Though delusional, it was worth trying for... that's what I use to think. But being known to the unknown nature of man would flood me with such sorrow, never would have imagined. Though wild it was the face you showed me while shoving me off from your heart but I am no less than a lioness, who would allow such pathetic wildness to wither away my charm.

Once people fall in love they tend to forget what is wrong and what is right. They base there judgments on pure affection and they overlook wrongs and that is how they end up being hurt. Love is a wonderful feeling but only when both sides are enjoying at same level, if one of them is compromising to the limit where they have to hide the facts and change their ideals then you are seriously going into the wrong lane. That is not love its being blind, blind to the fact that you are suffering, blind to the fact that you are ignoring everything that is wrong and blind to the very existence of his or her is making you change in a ways that you don't want to. Love is pure and honest but it never demands sacrifices or any compromises at least not at the expense of your happiness. Love makes you happy and yes you may get hurt some times but it doesn't involve hiding your doubts or your wishes and dreams. Love is suppose to be the feeling of bliss when meet that person not the person he or she demands you to be, it should be with what real you is not what he or she wants to make you.

Small changes can be dealt with but changes which will change your entire personality that is BIG NO. Always do what makes you happy whether its being in love or not. People don't die after break ups so always make sure you love the right person or you move on from the wrong one. Love doesn't make go suicidal it makes you blossom. So if you find some one worth compromising for than love that person with whole heart otherwise.. Suck it up! He or she won't be coming to your wedding.

Memories of past may burden me someday, but for me a blissful tomorrow is always the Sun.

BE BRAVE

Sometimes we have to fight our own battles alone. It may taint our soul and bruise our mind but still we have to try our best to win it not because there is some sort of prize waiting for us but because it will give us peace of mind. People become heart broken after one loss but let me tell you one thing unless and until you win the next one you will suffer with endless agony. In our life there comes a stage when we stop depending on others and believe in our own decisions. At that time we live our life as we feel right, we may make decisions that we will regret but still we desire to do more of mistakes. We often get hurt and sometimes at such scale that we stop believing in anything that is right. But we all are capable of rising from the ashes to become a new whole being no one in this whole universe has the capability of breaking our soul unless we give them the power to do so. Our mind is our brilliant friend it not only control our whole body but also makes us aware of the danger whenever we meet someone who will inflict any kind of harm to us. Our subconscious mind can sense the wrong from right but because we all have one crazy heart which make us ignore all the warnings that have been popping up in our lovely brain. Believe in yourself and in your decisions because everything can be made right if we wish to and and every battle can be won if try to.
Judgement may be harsh but it solely depends on what you choose to make out of it though that may not calm you but it will free your soul from the imprisonment of your mind.

Sometimes I wish to be happy for the things I have done in past. Some people just come as phase in your life and leave you with a unsolved mystery. Some heal you but some leave scars so deep that they remain fresh till the end of times, make you suffer in meaningless battles and thus giving you endless pain and agony.

Love is an endless war where no battle is won but people suffer and die as sacrifice.

Though this life may be a hell but I will live through it and pretend that heaven never existed, rather than giving up and submerge myself into regrets that I didn't try once.